Christian Unity Ministries

Unity News

May, 2004

CONTROLLING THE TONGUE

By Connie Whilden

(Connie Whilden is a Christian mediator and Advisory Board member of Christian Unity Ministries. She resides in Cedar Hill, Texas with her husband, John, and their four children.)

But Joshua commanded the people, "You shall not shout or let your voice be heard, nor shall any word proceed out of your mouth until the day I tell you to shout. Then you shall shout!"

Joshua 6:10

There is an important lesson here about controlling the tongue. The lesson is not at all about preventing people in the church from communicating--that would be a sure sign of Spiritual abuse. Rather, the lesson is about staying focused on what God is about and not being a distraction with our careless murmuring and mindless criticism.

Do you suppose there were those among the people of Israel who, even while dutifully marching around the walls of Jericho, were wondering what the point was and exactly where Joshua was leading them? Can you even imagine what the people would like to have been saying after the fifth or sixth time around the city? How might Jericho have turned out if the people had not controlled their tongues and had given way to murmuring, complaining, and backbiting? But Joshua's orders were clear--say absolutely nothing until given specific orders to do so.

Maybe God gave Joshua an insight into the hearts of the people and Joshua recognized the danger of whispering complaints and murmuring. Surely, Joshua understood that, even in the midst of an assignment from God, the tongue was capable of derailing the people despite the best of intentions.

Being on mission with God has not changed much since the fall of Jericho. In the church today, when we find ourselves in the thick of Spiritual warfare, the tongue can turn a sensitive situation into a disaster. Especially when dealing with broken or damaged relationships, even the best of intentions can produce hurtful or confusing counsel. Paul's advice that we should "let no corrupt word proceed out of [our] mouth, but only what is good for necessary edification..." is right on target when we are on mission with God. The truth is, when dealing with relationships within the church, we don't find wisdom in the careless words of men, but in the perfect Word of God. Careless, hurtful words, then, should be neither spoken nor heard.

When God is about to do something amazing among us, how often do we allow grumbling and murmuring to grieve the Spirit and to rob us of God's victory? In virtually every conflicted congregation to which our ministry has been exposed, what started as a mere difficult situation was escalated tremendously by the careless words of Christian brothers and sisters. James 3:8 says: But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. This being the case, rather than trying to mold our words, sometimes it is better just to stop them all together!

God inhabits the praises of His people. Maybe the opposite of inhabiting our praise is leaving us with our gripes, criticisms, and complaints. It is a blessing to our Lord when, in the interest of unity, we learn to control our tongues and build each other up with words rather than tear each other down. Sure, it's a free country and we're free to speak our minds, even in church. But how much sweeter it is, when the Church imitates the Father, and responds to relational distress by pouring out favor and grace on one another rather than bitterness and complaints. By learning to control our tongues, we invite the Spirit to move among us in any way at any time... and when that happens, the walls come tumbling down!

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